You thunder up the road toward Kuki Tunnel, meeting little police resistance as they are probably just glad you're heading away from the capital.

The Korean military, on the other hand, is up ahead. You're stopped at a roadblock, stuck between two collapsible concrete barriers on both sides. A tank rolls up at the other side of the checkpoint and the turret swivels around to point that long barrel at you.

A man sticks his head out of the tank and asks "Where do you think you're going?"

"I'm going north to finish that regime once and for all!" you reply.

"What, just with an excavator?" the soldier asks.

You shrug. "Well I'm not called the Howitzer vigilante, motherfucker!"

The soldier gets on the radio and reports to his superiors. "He (or she if you're playing as female) is going to bring down North Korea... yeah... uh-huh... With an excavator. You're right, we never thought to try that before. Okay, I'll remove the barricade. I mean screw it anyway, I'm a fucking conscript."

With that, you're past.

The soldiers stand to the side of the road, saluting you.

One waves you over at a gas depot. "Where you're going, you're gonna need this!" he tells you, filling up your tank.

You press onward up to the JSA, where North Korean guards on duty look in terror as they see your excavator heading right toward them. They wait for you to cross the demarcation line, then they swarm over your machine, attempting to pry you out.

You swivel the excavator around, knocking them the fuck off and taking out one or two of those blue shacks.

Their resistance is pretty pathetic, all things considered. Fancy polished rifles, but no bullets to load in?

You drive all the way straight up to Pyongyang, not seeing a single vehicle on the road the whole way. As you approach the North Korean capital, you see a giant statue of two women towering over the road, the Arch of Reunification.

A little girl is standing in the middle of the road, blocking you.

You stop and address her. "Move, little girl!" "Are you here to reunite our country?" she asks you.

"I haven't thought that far ahead," you admit. "But yes." She moves aside for you.

You enter the city, to find it evacuated. Except for one remaining citizen, Marshall Kim, who awaits you while sitting in his chromeplated steamroller.

"Excavator vigilante!" he shouts. "You will come no farther!"

"That's okay," you retort, "I've made it farther than I expected!"

Your two vehicles clash. His steamroller crushes part of your tank tread, preventing you from driving straight. Oh man, this is not good. Your excavator is no match for his steamroller. What will you do now?

I'll leave the sanctity of my ride and attack bodily. That fat pipsqueak is no match for my fists!

Fuck this, I'm retreating!